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Feb 13, 2017

Valentine's Day. A day that, for some, brings more misery than happiness. Those who are single and long to have someone to share their life with may find this day to be horribly depressing. 

I however, am not one of those people. 

Valentine's Day is just another day for me. Nothing special about it. I don't feel better or worse about myself on this day. Nor do I long for something that I am 'missing' in my life. 

I realized that for many this day is not so simple. For many, they feel lonely or like they are missing a piece in the grand puzzle of their life. This led me to think about the difference between being alone and being lonely. 

For me I am alone (well sort of) but I am not lonely. I don't feel that there is some invisible hole in my life that I need to fill. I am happy with who I am and my life as is. Being single is something that I truly adore and enjoy. I don't have to worry about anyone other than me and my kids and I like it that way.

But for many I know that they truly wish to find that other person who they feel will complete them. But I feel complete all by myself. So why is that? Is it simply because I can't miss what I never had? Maybe. 

Am I just hopelessly clueless because I have never really had a wonderful relationship? Maybe again.

But I do know that one of the biggest reasons I see people in miserable relationships is because they confused being alone and being lonely. You can be alone without being lonely. You can be happy with yourself when you are single. Really, you can! 

So many times I see women fall into bad relationships simply because they didn't want to be alone. They were lonely and needed something to fill a void and because they were so desperate to do so - they ended up with the first loser to come along. 

I ended up staying longer that I should, fighting for a relationship that was doomed to fail because I was trying to not be alone. I settled for horrible behavior, accepted being treated poorly just in the hopes that a relationship would work. I changed who I was at my core to try and make something work that was NEVER going to. 

How often have you done that? Are you someone who simply can't be single? Who hates being alone? Why? Are you unhappy with your own company and need to have someone else to focus on? 

Can you be alone without being lonely? 

Let's dive into that today on this podcast...